Forgive me... But I need to get this off my chest!

"And. Your. New.Minister... (inserts historic, long-ass, dramatic pause with music).. Is. (CLIFFHANGER.. roll credits)

Riveting stuff, I tell ya!

My favourite soap opera of all time… 

I cringe at the audacity most of our leadership seems to display as they (incompetently and fraudulently) fumble through their jobs. Vivid images of someone all up in my face saying, “Yeah I’m fucking you around. Whatchu gonna do about it bitch!!!”, keep flashing in my mind.

When are we planning to discuss the cavalier manner in which those in leadership positions view their positions? When will these positions be viewed (and treated) as the jobs they are and not just mere honorary titles bestowed upon the blessed few.

That being said, can our champion (yes you sir) adapt a more thought-out and considerate (nation-focused) procedure when recruiting for these positions. This Santa Claus approach I am seeing now, where such critical positions seem to be treated as Christmas gifts, is not revolutionary comrade. It’s not ‘weeeeecking’.  Yes we see you there. Crossing off and ticking away as you scroll down that already suspect list of friends…Oops I meant candidates.

I’ve never been to parliament but I’d so love to go. Every time I picture it inside this glitter-filled brain of mine, I see a high school corridor in those schools where the governing body has totally given up. There is a cheery, buddy-buddy conversation, about everything that is not school, going on and everyone is clearly drunk. There are prefects who are only in power because they are popular with all the delinquent kids, the smokers and the slutty, cool girls from rich families (whom I’ve always wanted to be). And they all vote for each other because they’ve all been at this school longer than law, logic or even life should allow (veterans I tell you). The Grade 8 to 10 votes are thrown out, they don’t matter. 

Say what you will, this is the picture I get most times I think about it.

They articulate all the right sentiments in their discussions, street circus rallies (read ‘act-lik-we-care’ parties), and long winded (and so unnecessary) excuses and smokescreens. All this while those who put them up there suffer, I say go do your own thing honey you are not about to eat if you wait. 

My heart tears every time I pick up a newspaper, catch a glimpse of a headline as I drive or happen to overhear the sordid details of a ministers shameful misconduct as I channel hop searching for scandal (Scandal! eTV,  get it? Whoaa tough crowd) that actually has been scripted for my amusement.

I finally do make my way to the programming of my desire, and while taking in Donna and Thembeka’s superb styling, Mangi’s adorable facial expressions plus Daniels alleged corruption, I realize that the juiciest drama was a channel or two ago. And I think to myself, “I wonder who styles the leads in that soapie that our democracy has become.

In that breath, my dear friends, countrymen and fellow sufferers, I say, please, oh please say this of me… He wanted change in the worst kind of way.